The ability to turn anything into a belt.

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The power to be missed when present.

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The power to fart slightly less deadly

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The Power To Only Be Able To Move Yourself (including wheelchairs and all that) 1 meter in the entire life of the universe

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The power to smell through your arse.

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The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

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Having taste buds in your anus.

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The power to die

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The power to change colors to the excact same as before.

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The power to have a device to turn the tv off without touching it!!! :O

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the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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The power to be gangsta, only in front of true gangsta's.

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The ability to make cardboard taste slightly less like cardboard.

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The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

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the power of losing and getting in 2nd place or 3th. the power of clearing your mind only for it to stay blank. the power of riding a horse really well aslong as you think it is a cow. the power of breathing AIR. the power of bellyflopping cement. the power of reading ancient arameîc. the power of speaking perfect gibberish.

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The power to have any girl as your girl friend but they turn ugly

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ability to smack the crap out of austin calhounh and laugh at him

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The power to drive a car, but only once you've passed your driver's license.

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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Be invincible...but only when you're NOT in danger.

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The power to get laid by your right hand.

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The power to die and not come back to life.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!