The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

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the power to take a poo everywhere but on the toilet

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The power to like any show

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The power to magically summon a knife at a gunfight. Moral: "A knife in a gunfight is pretty good when the guns run out of ammo"

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The power to shoot glue from your penis

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to zap people but only yourself

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The power to make your left hand glow whenever you put your right hand up your ass.

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Super strength that works for a millisecond.

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The power to change colors to the excact same as before.

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the power to sleep while standing!

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The power to have a device to turn the tv off without touching it!!! :O

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The power to complete a 100m race in exactly 100 seconds.

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The power to hold your pee for 5 minutes longer than normal.

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ability to smack the crap out of austin calhounh and laugh at him

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The power to be invisable but for only 5 seconds or the power to fly but only 2 feet off the ground.

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The power to listen to Meghan Straight talk

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The power to wiggle your big toe whenever you have a car accident with a baby gorilla on the passenger seat every other Thursday of every other leap year.

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THE POWER TO NOT HAVE SUPERPOWERS! ...............ever

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The power to sweeten sugar

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The power to drive a car, but only once you've passed your driver's license.

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The power to vote for the Presidential candidate of your choice, only to be overruled by the Florida Supreme Court.

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The power to walk on water, but only if its temperature is below 0° C

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The power to have time when you're doing nothing.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!