The power to buy the newest iPhone without the charger...

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the power to predict the outcome of any event after it's already happened

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Having taste buds in your anus.

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the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

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The power to be Omnipotent and create a rock too heavy for yourself to lift.

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The power to like any show

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The ability to find objects in the last place you look

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The power to die

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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the passive ability to teleport to the center of the world every tenth of a second

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the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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The power to be able to see 1 second into the future

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The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

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The power to take perfectly timed photos when nothing interesting is going on.

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the power to melt your bones

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The ability to pee while standing up for men

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The power to attract any women you like by ripping of your junk.

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The power to not think of a productive power.

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The ability to stop farting so that you blow up like a balloon that eventually bursts.

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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The ability to jump

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The power to get laid by your right hand.

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The power to die and not come back to life.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!