- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to read this sentence

The ability to play UNO without a tongue

The power to talk in Wingdings.

The power to turn cake into pie

The power to die at any moment you want.

The power to be missed when present.

The ability to find the sharpest object in an given drawer, by having it puncture your hand. Every time.

Acid tears.

Astral Projection. Distance: .3mm

The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.

The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

The power to become sick only to spread it to your enemy but you can't stop being sick until you have treatment.

The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

The power to jizz mango chutney

The power to produce up to 20 gummy bears at once through the process of budding

The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

The power to magically summon a knife at a gunfight. Moral: "A knife in a gunfight is pretty good when the guns run out of ammo"

The power to read terms and conditions

The ability to metamorphose into any kind of cheese

The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

The power to shoot glue from your penis

The power to speak any language except the language of your people.

Pointless Super Powers