The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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The power to grab a cats face

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The power to remove your foreskin at any given time

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The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

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the power to have a combination lock, and forget the code

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the power to turn into a cheerio at will

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the power to make ads 0.000001 seconds shorter

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The power to have sex with any woman you want, but you are gay

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The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

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the power to flick a coin and get heads 50% of the time.

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The power to live forever until you die a natural way or get killed.

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the power to eat people :D

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The power to cheat on your wife with your wife only if shes on her period

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The power to have useless superpowers which can only be used at wrong times

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ability to levitate using my fart...

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The power to open doors with your bare hands

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The power to turn into a slightly smaller, weaker version of yourself.

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The power to make money appear, but only when you don't want or need anything

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The power to speak only in hashtags. #awkward

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the ability to glow in the light.

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The power to lick any telephone pole to call somebody in the winter.

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the ability to say either "beans are magical!" or "beans are fruit!" in an angry tone, and have people believe you

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The power to waste time talking about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive

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The ability to fly away, but there is a 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% chance that you will get hit by a plane while taking off.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!