The power to get stuck to doorknobs in dangerous situations

The power to stop time for all living beings in the world, including yourself, and starting it again at the same time as the time would have been if you didn't stop it.

The power to count exactly how many babies under the age of three weeks existed in the last 14 seconds.

The power to make cats ask for cheeseburgers in comically broken English

The power to shoot off your clothes at any moment while using your hands and feet

the power to go slower than a snail :l

Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

The ability to not get sunburn, but only at night.

To be ALMOST able to run faster than a speeding bullet

the power to be nonflammable unless your on fire

the power to kiss your own ass

To be able to go to the future but only at 1 second per second.

the power to make a pillow filled with feathers into a pillow filled with fluff

The power to make the key on your keyboard not work

understanding every language only if you get insulted

The power to teleport homeless people to the sun

The ability 2 breath underwater, but not above water

the power to teleport to the center of the earth

The ability to produce snot twenty times faster than normal.

The astounding ability to lay eggs instead of give birth.

The power to eat food.

The power HAVE A SUPER POWERD LASER SHIT

the power to detect when there is oxygen near you

The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a chi...ldren's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!