The ability to have ALL the powers... But you have to have them activated by people you fight. Only the people you fight....

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The power to think of powers someone else has already come up with

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The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

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the power to explain accidents when nobody gives a rats ass anymore

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The power to count exactly how many babies under the age of three weeks existed in the last 14 seconds.

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the power to sing like a pro but only when in a bathroom or when autotune is involved...

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The power to make cats ask for cheeseburgers in comically broken English

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The ability to not live forever

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The power to look like your jacking off every time your mom walks in the room

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The power to only be attracted to people under the age of 15.

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Having the power to trap bugs with your manly body hair (chest hair, nose hair, moustache, armpit hair, pubic.......)

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The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

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The power to turn everything you touch in to a plastic fork.

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the power to kiss your own ass

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the power to play a flute to summon a black leprechaun but only when your on the verge of passing out

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the ability to predict the winning lottery numbers in a completely random order

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The ability to produce snot twenty times faster than normal.

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The astounding ability to lay eggs instead of give birth.

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The Ability to shit studs once a week

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The power to float in water, and then sink sometimes.

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The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

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The power to drink parfume and not get disgusted

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The power to telepathically fold paper.

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The power to fly but only when touching the ground

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!