The power to get the ketchup bottle open.

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The power to have sex with yourself.

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the power to turn anything into candy but u r diabetic

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x-ray vision but only through glass

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The ability to be Rihanna only if in a car with Chris Brown

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The power to make a few turtles fly

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the power to be random edhvaidfhviqeadhvkfdghiABJDISLJABDIFSJNAKNGREAAN EFBADVBNSJVNCJBV XJDBV`DNCI`DNVINBAID

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The ability to defecate red clay bricks when startled or scared

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The ability to think about saying something,but then forget and spend an eternity trying to remember what it was.

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The power to instantly become pregnant

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The power to be Carl Sagan, minus the intellect.

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Ability to sneeze n cough and sounds like a fart

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the ability to drink a 40 oz. while playing madden

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The ability to piss flames.

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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the power to rob a bank only with S.W.A.T beside you

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The power to cry lava.

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The power to jack off 1,000 times a day.

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the ability to turn off any fans on a hot day

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the power of reading your own mind while in a car accident

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the power to have the best sex in the world, but only when your in a coma.

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The ability to turn anything into cheese, but be lactose intolerant.

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The power to eat and make stool .01 seconds after.

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The power to feeling the earthquake effect after earthquake

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!