the ability to smile a tooth grin while pooping on your own chest

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The power to teleport but only on the surface of the sun.

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the power to cry from drama movies but only when theres no girls around you.

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The ability to create one iron nail. The power can only be used at 12:45 P:M every five days, and will only work if the nail you created previously has been destroyed and/or broken down to a state in which it would be unusable as a typical nail.

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The power to have the confidence to ask anyone out but always get rejected.

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The power to put on a sweater when u already have one on when its 90 degrees outside but can only do it outside

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The power to make any woman have earth shattering totally consuming climaxes at will, but only if she's having sex with another man

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The power to vote for Osama Bin Laden for president. Moral: And to believe it could still be worse...

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the ability to know what the fox say

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

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The power to do a wheelie on a unicycle.

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The power to turn your hair ginger at a whim.

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The power to fly to your In-Law's house and ONLY your In-Law's house.

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The powers to know every martial art ever when your neck is broken.

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The power to use a computer whenever you want, but only at libraries

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The superpower to poo at will.

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The power to make everyday Christmas once a year

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The power to be never need to use the bathroom

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to make asians smart

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The power to have 21/20 vision.

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the power to produce shampoo out your eyes

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the power to turn on anything by saying every digit of pi near it.

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the power to go into a coma

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!