The power to have any guy you want but every time he looks at you you turn more lesbian.

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The power to find a paper clip when you need one.

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the power to get in the van

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The power to die at will.

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The power to go Skiing and ice skating in mid summer

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The power to vote for Osama Bin Laden for president. Moral: And to believe it could still be worse...

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

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The power to switch on clappers by snapping your fingers

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The power to use a computer whenever you want, but only at libraries

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the power to convince girls to have sex with you, but you don't have a cock

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The power to be never need to use the bathroom

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The ability to walk on water, but only if you're Jesus

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The ability to perpetually masturbate.

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the power to absorb gamma radiation, but no resistance to radiation poisoning.

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The power to see your neck without a mirror

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The abilty to jump 50m in the air without the abilty to survive long falls

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The power to be an exceedingly homosexual man and be constantly surrounded by sexy women.

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The power to resist Buzz Lightyear´s lazer beam, but only in real life

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AXE Body Spray Rituals--Learn Manly Rituals the Girls Can't Manliest Rituals &Get Her Affection

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the ability to smell sounds

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The power to shoot spaghetti out of your finger tips.

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the power to be infinitely constipated

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The power to shit brix, No wait.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!