The ability to turn bread into really burnt toast while no one is watching.

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the power to grow stings out of your genitals

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The power to vote for Donald trump as president

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the power to feel the emotions of other people, that are severely depressed.

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the power of superspeed but only backwards

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The power to grow one wing

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The power to fill trash cans with garbage

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The power to drive any Lamborghini or other shit expensive car you want. You still need to get a car like that though...

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The power to transform your appearance so that you look unmistakably like yourself.

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The ability to mimic your actions in a mirror perfectly

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Ladder hands.

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the power to turn invisible when no one else is around.

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The power to fly one millimeters above the ground.

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The ability to know what time it is, but only when you have a watch on.

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you can get lots of pussy, but their all severed

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The power to look really cool when sitting in a chair when nobody's looking at you

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The power to attract bullets.

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the power to move things with your mind in your imagination

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The power to not be able to get powers

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The power to read and agree to the terms of service.

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Inspector 51 - able to identity, within a radius of 20 yards, people whose house or flat number is 51

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the power to sneeze cum

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The power to delete the "missing a finger" comment on shitbrix.com.

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The power to heal any wounds caused by the bite of an Indonesian speckled carpet shark in an area of slightly tepid saltwater any time between 3:00 and 4:00 in the afternoon

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!