The power to turn coleslaw into cabbage.

The power to communicate through complex technology that was only developed 50 years ago and is still un known if it is harmful

The power to easily dodge any bullets from any weapons ever... as long as the bullets are made of cheese.

The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

the power to be the best looking person but only to rapists.

The power to understand the purpose of life, and every other world mystery, exactly .5 of a second before you die.

the power to have diarrhea at any time

The power to hear other people's thoughts when they aren't thinking.

The power to walk thru mud and not leave a footprint

The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?

The power to choose the next president of the united states of america.

The ability to spit in random obscure crayola colors.

The power to change your emotions

Everything Hawkeye does

The power to have explosive diarrhea after eating Chipotle

The power to fly 2mm above the ground

The ability to explode upon contact with glass.

the power to speak chinese to indians and indians only

The ability to turn bread into really burnt toast while no one is watching.

the power to grow stings out of your genitals

the power to feel the emotions of other people, that are severely depressed.

The power to say something only when you have a mouth

the power of superspeed but only backwards

The power to drive any Lamborghini or other shit expensive car you want. You still need to get a car like that though...

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!