The ability to teleport, but only into solid stone.

The power to fart really smelly :P

the super power to remove your super power

the power to live a happy and fullfilling life...

The power to hold your breath forever, but only in a hot-tub.

the power to read 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 books every second

the power to-OMFG IT'S TAILS DOLL!

the ability to slightly change your facial expression. sometimes.

Q: What is 1+1? A: An equation.... Duh...

The power to change your eye colour but you are the only one who can see the difference.

The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

The power to change the shape of any object at will

The power to shoot flames from your hands, only its not really warm.

The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

The power to fly but only if you standing on the ground

Oye sun teri ma ka saki na ka

The power to die when u drink bleach

The power to lose your genitals when you masturbate or have sex

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

THE POWER TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS

The power to be Helen Keller at will.

The power to pull your heart out from your chest.

the power to hope you get a job at the mall because they laid everybody off and sent the jobs off somewhere cheap

The power to be invincible everywhere but your face

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!