The ability to pause time. However, this pauses everything. Even you. You are screwed.

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The ability to write a pointless superpower, which was posted earlier without having read it.

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the power to have no one read this post

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The power to see through clothes of women 70+.

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the power to bi ugly

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The power to switch your left pinky toe with your right big toe and vice versa.

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The power to make toast but only when it has bread in it and it's turned on.

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The ability to fly but only for 5 seconds and when you are on an oily floor in tube socks being chased by 10 Puerto Rican woman.

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The power to jizz in your pants when you eat a grape.

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The power to turn into paper

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The power to still have 0.01 percent of germs on your hands.

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The power to pee out your butt and poop out of your weenie

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The power to hate someone you don't even know

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The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

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the power to save Chinese people... who needs um?

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The power to switch your right and left ears.

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The power to become a lime only when you're left nipple brushes against your left shoe whilst it is superglued to your ding dong and you're strapped to a bed naked in the woods.

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The power to teleport to the middle of the Pacific Ocean

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TyPiNg In LoWeR aNd CaPs To AnNoY oThErS

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The power to tie any type of knot but only when using dental floss

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The power to win the lottery, but only the december 21 of 2012.

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the power to die on command

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The power to burp where you fart, and fart where you burp.

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the power to allow dumbass powers to be written on this site

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!