The power to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

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The power to write pointless super powers when you have your final exams to study for...

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The power to bring Magic: the Gathering cards to life, but only the land cards.

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The power to piss your pants each time you feel threatened.

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The power to shoot lasers out your eyes but the first time you do it it burns your eyes and you go blind

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the power to make youtube videos buffer twice as fast on your iPhone.

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The ability to kill someone with your mind. But by doing so, you also die.

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The power to think of hilarious intensely racist jokes, but only at Black Lives Matter protests.

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The power to go blind but you cant go back to seeing everything

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The Power to find anything and than forgetting where did you put it

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the power to understand what kate bush is singing

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The Power to make Anyone's Teeth Clean...

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the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

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Asexual reproduction.

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The power to save 16% or more on your auto insurance

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the power to kill yourself

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The power to do your homework, but only when you're in the class where the homework is due

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The ability to get aids and stay a virgin.

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The ability to pickle cumbers at an accelerated rate

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The power to sleep with your eyes open but you still can't see what's going on

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The power to make condoms out of pizza dough.

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The power to glow in the dark

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The power to envision 1 possible death scenario for any person you look at.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!