The power to float without gravity.

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The power to think.

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the power to turn star wars figurines into sticky notes, only on sunday afternoons

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The power to have the confidence to ask anyone out but always get rejected.

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The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

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the power to be able to run long distances without getting tired

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The power to make everyone you touch see nothing but porn

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the power to waste time doing stupid stuff like reading this.

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The power to not be able to reach the top shelf.

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Sorry. The power to square root -1.

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The power to breath in lava, If you don't burn.

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The power to be born.

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The power to describe the taste of water.

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The power to create little lightning bolts, but only by peeing on a electrical device, you can create little tiny lightning bolts.

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The ability to grow a beard whenever anyone in the world shits

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Power to listen to Hatsune Miku while reading these.

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The power to make something slightly sticky. Like after you each a juicy piece of fruit. You make everything feel like that.

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The power to turn into a bucket for 1 second throughout your lifetime.

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The power to lose body parts spontaneously.

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The power to travel faster than the speed of light but never slower than the speed of light.

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The power to beat bad ass kids without getting arrested!!!

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The power to sign every comment - Some douche (Scott?)

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The power to walk on water, but only if it contains exactly 0.25 ppm of Aluminum.

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The power to fly only when in contact with the ground

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!