The power to shit purple butterflies.

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The power to piss with REALLY high force.

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The power to hear everything in pig-Latin.

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The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

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the ability to taste the difference of 3 types of cheeses

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The power to see red in a slightly lighter shade

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The power to instantaneously teleport in front of your mom each time you masturbate.

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The power to suck deez nuts

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The ability to fly only as fast as you can walk.

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The power to make something slightly sticky. Like after you each a juicy piece of fruit. You make everything feel like that.

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The power to cough, but only at funerals, and speeches

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The Power to glow in the dark during day time only.

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The power to forget why you got hurt when you get hurt.

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The power to walk after about 6 months of age.

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The power to walk on water, but only if it contains exactly 0.25 ppm of Aluminum.

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The power to fly only when in contact with the ground

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The power to die when you get scared.

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The Power Above This Power During Night time. The Power Below This Power During the day. Invulnerable for one second during dawn and dusk.

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The ability to kill oxygen in a radius around you

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The power to repeat everything you say twice. The power to repeat everything you say twice.

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(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

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The Power of being able to do anything but does not work when you need it

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The power to write about power.

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The power to do ANY FREAKING THING YOU WANT, but only when your dead.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!