The power to float without gravity.

the power to turn star wars figurines into sticky notes, only on sunday afternoons

The power to have the confidence to ask anyone out but always get rejected.

The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

The power to make everyone you touch see nothing but porn

The power to look at huge breasts and avoid thinking about it.

the power to waste time doing stupid stuff like reading this.

The power to get older every second

The power to not hear thunder.

The power to always have the worst thing possible happen

The power to not be able to reach the top shelf.

The power to breath in lava, If you don't burn.

The power to piss with REALLY high force.

The power to hear everything in pig-Latin.

The power to be born.

The power to see red in a slightly lighter shade

The power to create little lightning bolts, but only by peeing on a electrical device, you can create little tiny lightning bolts.

The power to have a stroke at will.

The power to lose body parts spontaneously.

The power to turn into a bucket for 1 second throughout your lifetime.

The power to travel faster than the speed of light but never slower than the speed of light.

The power to make mace have no effect on your left eye - but double the effect on your right eye

The Power to glow in the dark during day time only.

the power to quickly re-wrap christmas presents

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!