the power to talk to animals but only when it means stealing your ice cream

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The ability to swim on dry land only when submerged in dry water.

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To stab Djones

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The power to cure cancer pantients of minor rashes.

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the power to reach a top speed of 200 miles an our, but only in built-up areas

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The power to jump only one centimeter high.

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The power to be a human for 1 second once a month.

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The power to believe I type actual morals. Moral: At horsehead network? Now please go look for prostitutes at a church or astronauts under the sea you fucklng ass and blahblah!

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the ability to throw a midget further than any mortal man

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The power to control which nut your sperm comes from.

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The power to read the minds of hobos. ( now you know what hobos think about you )

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The power to grow boobs

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The power to look into cheese.

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th eability to have sex with anyone in the world but have to have sex with rosie o'donnell first

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The power to jump, but only on the ground.

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The power to make me a sandwich without first being instructed.

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The power to transform you in something randomly

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the power to die if you think

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The ability to make everything on you invisible, exept yourself

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The power to walk after about 6 months of age.

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The power to get a boner any time you want

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The power to win a gold medal in the special Olympics... you are perfectly healthy

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The power to eat anything in a minute.

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Autokinesis (the ability to move your own body).

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!