The power to know the perfect rebuttal, but only after you've lost and nobody cares about what you were arguing about anymore.

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The power to steal all the money in the world without ever stealing anything ever.

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The power to eat anything in a minute.

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The power to be immune to every third bullet.

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the power to fly but only about 5 feet above the grove, and only after you fart

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the power to be a shitstick on a stick with a shitstick on a shit with a shitstick

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The power to instantly faceplant when jumping

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The power to slam a revolving door.

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The power to run past the speed of sound... Backwards

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To be able to make a pencil dull... Get it it point less!!!!!

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Power to stop a moving oslating fan from moving.

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the ability to throw a midget further than any mortal man

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the power to be tall only if your Yao Ming

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The power to turn invisible but only when playing a trombone

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The power to give yourself a BJ.

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Having Wolverine’s ability to healing from any damage, but still healing at a normal human rate of recovery.

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the ability to fly to Pluto holding ur breath

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The power to automatically register soda caps online, but only if it's Diet.

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The power to cure cancer pantients of minor rashes.

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The ability to turn into a mermaid, only on Halloween.

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The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

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The power to glow... in the dark...

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The power to restate the obvious.

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The power to be able to do things right, but only when you're not doing them.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!