The power to hate someone you don't even know

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The ability to know what people think of you when they see you. But you already know everyone hates you.

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the ability to solve paradoxes

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The ability to piss lightning and be able to make people dance by wiggling your monobrow

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the power to tell when someone is in your car

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The power to describe the taste of water.

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The power to have no powers!

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the power to eat a ridiculous amount of bagels

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The power to shoot spiderwebs but only out of your fully erect dick

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Th power to be telepathetic

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The power to sign every comment - Some douche (Scott?)

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the power to die on command

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The superpower to be able to blend in with trees when there are no trees in a 5 km radius

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The power to kill yourself at will

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The power to understand the purpose of live, and every other world mystery, exactly .5 of a second before you die.

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you can teleport anywhere in the world but every time you do you get punched by kimboslice in the face

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The power to control facial hair of women.

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The power to write about power.

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The power to speak Braille.

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The power of licking your own elbow and nose

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The Power to climb on your own shoulders.

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The ability to turn traffic lights red in your lane and green for everyone else

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The power to blink 1% faster than normal.

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The power to turn food into human waste.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!