the power to say i can bend you

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The power to cure a ham

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The power to have time when you're doing nothing.

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The power to perform the Kali Ma sacrificial ritual on yourself.

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the power to poop forever and pee forever. ,the power too teleport 1in.

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the power to read and agree to the terms or service

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The power to turn back the clock at will. Not time, just clocks.

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The power to make my mom shout at me

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the power to forget what you were do-- wait, what?

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the power to fly, but only at the speed of light you, for less than 1 second, but you must land at the exact same spot you started and your mind cannot comprehend anything any differently than a normal human

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The ability to shit from your mouth and burp through your ass

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the power to hate disney stars

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The power to grow two extra arms that are invisible, can't touch anything, and you can't control.

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The power to turn apples into pears

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The power to move 1 minute forward in time every 60 seconds.

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the power to remember the lyrics to your least favorite song

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The power to sneeze in front of birthday cakes

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The power to move things with your mind while you sleep.

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The power of see inside your eyes.

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to be able to walk on water for 2minutes at a time

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The power to deliver gifts around the world in one night but be fatter than hell, live in a frozen wasteland, and only little kids think you exist

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The power to poop anytime you want to.(technically its an okay power cause when you need to poop you could poop in another time). so my friend thought of one and he said: The power to die anytime but you still get old and you get to be like a 200 hundred year old man/woman and have the capability of their age so basically just die when your 90.

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The power to read the mind of a cow that has produced a piece of cheese that has traveled 447,800 miles but only when looking at that piece of cheese

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The power to be meta, but nobody thinks it's cool any more.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!