the ability to be on Oprah but only in the crowd

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The power to achieve orgasm within 3 seconds

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the power to transform into pedobear with diplomatic immunity...

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the power to come down off a high but only if you have cancer

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The power to shit someone elses pants.

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The ability to grow trees out of money.

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The power to give Japanese cartoons seizures.

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The power to shag your best mates sister, and get away with it.

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The power to psychically give politicians half baked excuses for failed and immoral decisions.

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The power to use expired coupons, this Power expired 3 years ago

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The power to see 3 seconds into the future.

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The ability to be a janitor at Disney World

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the power to smell the insisde of your own nose

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The power to make broccoli turn purple and give it eyes

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The power to remember your name without a name tag

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the power to let it not be rape if you yell "surprise!"

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The power to have any power on this site.

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Backwards speak to power the.

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the ability to travel forward in time at the speed of regular time

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The ability to produce infinite cat flavored toast made from poop out of your mouth, only while in public with 100 people that would stare at you.

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The ability to predict something after it's already happened.

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The power to switch your eyeballs with your testicles but you still see out your eyes and your testicles are leaking.

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The power to invent a secret language that everyone understand

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The power to smile uncontrollably.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!