The power to time travel to the present moment

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the ability to stay in the same place while running

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The power to get a boner any time you want

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The ability to shapeshift into any items but only pedophiles can use it

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The power to have courage to tell hitler that you are jew

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The power to tell if a politician is lying. (They always are.)

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Ultra-strength when peeing

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The ability not cry while cutting onions, only after hearing the news that a family member has just died

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to be able to walk on water for 2minutes at a time

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the power to be tall only if your Yao Ming

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the ability to "speak in tongues"...

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The awe-inspiring power of being able to throw up at will while yelling IMMA FIRIN' ME LAZOR.

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The ability to laugh like tickle me elmo

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The power to steal all the money in the world without ever stealing anything ever.

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The ability to charge my iPhone, by starring at it real hard while rubbing my nipples!!!

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The ability to fire a gun with precision accuracy. But only if your the target

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The ability to make broken pens work again.

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The power to control which nut your sperm comes from.

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The power to always choose the broken condoms without knowing

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The power to state Goku`s power level without crushing you`re scouter.

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the power to shrink to 1 inch but only in a crowded street and you cant look up girls dresses,

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The power to make me a sandwich without first being instructed.

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The power to return my ps4 for the third time, and wait for months to get a new one only to discover its the tv connection which is broken and I cant afford a new tv because I already spent a lot of money on ps4 games. Mural: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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the power to fly but only on a plane

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!