the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

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The power to kill yourself.

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The power to play their superhero name on guitar.

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The power to obey gravity

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The power to see oxygen.

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The power to shoot glue from your penis

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the power to see through people's clothing when they're naked

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

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The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

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power to age faster

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The power of becoming an apple tree

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the power to hover an inch above the ground once every month.

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the power to turn food into shit

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Invincibility, but you feel twice as much pain to everything

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The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

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the power to be immortal, but only temporally

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The power to laugh so hard you can't breath at "Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?" Jokes.

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The power to be able to taste shit from miles away.

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to eat a pie and get to fart an apple (cus why not)

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The ability to produce rainbows and yoghurt from your armpits.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

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The power to chew with your tongue

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!