the power of milking a cow aslong it is a horse that you are milking. the power to ride a bull for 0.55 nanoseconds. the power to kill 1 bacteria every 20 min. the power to spread herpes without having symptoms. the power of sharing awkward details of your bowel movements to your family at dinner. the power to lift a small cup of water. the power of falling of your face whilst knowing it will happen 20sec before. the power of inhibiting passage on the curb. the power to cause massive traffic jams without owning a car. the power of listening but not understanding. the power of understanding all languages but the one that is being spoken to you at the time.

The ability to turn things into gold, but only when the material the item is made of is more valuable than gold.

The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

The power to walk on very very shallow water (

The ability to teleport a maximum of two inches.

The power to fly at 0.00000000000000001mm off of the ground at a speed of 1 mile per hour whenever you desperately need the toilet.

the power to jizz money

The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

The power to permanently shorten your own penis

The power of fork-throwing. This includes large pie servers, spoons, and basically any other utensils that are not knives.

The power of hindsight

the power to stop masturbating every day

the power to hear everything in sign language and see everything in braille

The power to think of your death and then you die.

The power to be asleep while in bed

The power to change colors to the excact same as before.

the power to have 20/20 vision only when wearing aviators

The power to crap without pissing.

The power to suck your own dick but not when your horny

The power to fry and suffer harder than anyone when lit on fire.

De poverr too tipe relly shiiti annd stil bee undrstod bai rettadad peepols unly.

The Superpower to sleep at night.

The power to fly, but only in microgravity.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!