The power to balance the light switch in the middle but only on the 4th try.

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The power to think this exact sentence at the worst possible time.

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the power to fly, but only when you poop

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The Ability to shit studs once a week

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The power to recharge batteries by licking them.

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The Power to lost your Dankness every time you Breath.

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The power to be an ugly barnacle who is so ugly that everyone dies.

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The power to get a boner whenever you see a rainbow.

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the power to fly but only during a severe hail storm

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The power to open any trash can lid with telekinesis if its within view.

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The ability to invent a new language that no one else will ever learn.

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teleport to the place where you stand

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the power to stop masturbating every day

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The power to revive anyone....But only if they are alive.

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the ability to die on command

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power of having a short attention sp-- Ooh shiny!

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The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

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The power to open doors with your bare hands

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The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

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The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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Superhuman strength and endurance but only when sleeping

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The ability to not drop anything ...when you're not holding anything

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The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!