The power to die every time you are standing on something.

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The power to understand irony.

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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the power to read when you're not looking at any word or symbol

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The power to fuck any person of the opposite sex, but you're incredibly gay.

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The power to get arrested

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the power to read your own mind

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The ability to instantly make all your clothes vanish but only when you're in a job interview

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The power to cash cheques that are only ever made out to someone else.

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The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

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The power to release the bogus

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The power to turn into a 90 year old woman with 20+ diseases

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the power to sleep with any woman, unless your a man

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The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle

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Listen to Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black everywhere you go.

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the ability to only crap while on a toilet

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The power to pick your nose but you happen to be Lord Voldermot

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The power to heal but every time you heal your leg or arm falls off.

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The power to eat pop-tarts as soon as they pop out of the toaster

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The power to instant nose-bleed, but not be able to stop it.

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to zap people but only yourself

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the passive ability to teleport to the center of the world every tenth of a second

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The ability to fart, hiccup, vomit, crap, burp, laugh, cry, scream and sneeze all at the same time

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The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!