The power of eletric energy in the ancient history

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the power to eat anything edible but not if it's edible.

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The power of magnetism! Aka being so magnetic that you have to live in a home completely made out of plastic, and cant go out because you either get hit by random flying frying pans and stuff literally attracted towards you, or even worse, you could get dragged towards a car in movement and become red paste. A guy with this power could not take it any more, so he bought an iron necklace and put it on... may he rest in peace...

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The power to make money disappear.

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The power to breath under water but only if you're holding your breath

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The power to a nokia phone.

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The power to resurrect Hitler at will, will only work if you are Jewish.

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The power to open any trash can lid with telekinesis if its within view.

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the power to stop masturbating every day

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the power to awesomely tap dance when you are angry.

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The power to detect homosexuality in animals. ~scramjat

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

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the ability to be a super genius but can't speak or write

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No matter what you eat, always shit peanut butter.

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whenever you want to sleep an anime starts happening in real life

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The ability to hear the opinions of inanimate objects.

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The power to bleed anally at will

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The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

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The power to smell through your arse.

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The power to do control the atmosphere, but only in space.

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The power to make a small chair appear -- one time.

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the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!