the ability to only crap while on a toilet

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Listen to Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black everywhere you go.

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle

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The power to instant nose-bleed, but not be able to stop it.

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The power to pick your nose but you happen to be Lord Voldermot

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The power to heal but every time you heal your leg or arm falls off.

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The power to eat pop-tarts as soon as they pop out of the toaster

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The power to see through glass

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The ability to fart, hiccup, vomit, crap, burp, laugh, cry, scream and sneeze all at the same time

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The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

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to zap people but only yourself

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the passive ability to teleport to the center of the world every tenth of a second

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The power of omniscience but it causes a near fatal heart attack every time you think.

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The power to die on the spot and not revive

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The power to think of a good super power right now.

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The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

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The power to think up a pointless superpower.

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The power to control the weather, but only in space

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the power to photobomb random peoples photos without even knowing

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the power to see through clear glass.

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The power to ejaculate needles.

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the power to do anything ...but only when you're dreaming, lasting only as long as you're asleep..

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the power to know when someone queefed

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!