The power to make grass grow 1cm longer than usual.

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The power to remember the funniest thing in the world and have a full on laughing fit, as long as you are at a funeral.

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The power to keep up with the kardashians

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The power to have a pointless superpower and after realizing that it's pointless

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The power to predict the present

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Absolute Defeatability- the power to be defeated by any and all things physical and nonphysiological.

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the power to be friends with Donald trump

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the power to be good at something your already good at.

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The power to turn water into wine.

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The power to read upside down...only when you're upside down.

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The power to grant underwater breathing to Mosquitos.

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The power to explode when someone looks at you and regenerate in 10 minute after exploding but you can only regenerate from exploding.

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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The power to see in the dark, but only when the lights are on.

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The power to turn into the Hulk, but only when you are asleep.

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The superpower to realize that if you guys thumb my former comment up, then it is no longer a useless "superpower" and would by itself contradict uh... itself.. by being useful... Moral: Hey, turning into Beiber at will is useful for banging silly young chicks at will is it not? And I will rather bang brainless women (beliebers yes I mean you, because everyone deserves some love) Disclaimer: Sexual age of consent is 16 over here, and good luck calling a whole nation for pedophiles, nope girls simply mature faster here... Fact: Above.

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the ability to spin gold into straw

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The power to hover a milimeter off solid ground when performing a walking motion.

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The power to ejaculate needles.

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the ability to make toast while standing on your head at 12:46 every Tuesday Greenwich Meridian Time.

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The power to never die unless you become sick, injured, or breathe through your nose:/

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The power to change your hair's color to white when you're old.

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The power to understand that if you type or read at this section, then it is probably because it means something to you... Moral: That is almost a superpower... I mean wow pointless makes a point which is pointless, and a pointless point with a point is... anyway I just divided by infinite loop. Cant say that is far away from zero which by itself is basically a circle... Damn im good! (just for that final line im gonna get thumbed down, its worth it though.

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The power to burst into flames (Like the Human Torch), but immediately burn to death after doing so.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!