the ability to blow yourself

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The power to quote memes randomly

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The power to say WACKY WAVING INFLATABLE ARM FLAILING TUBE MAN - but only at peoples funerals or when taking a piss (but you uncontrolably flail your arms).

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The power to make your shit sink or float on command.

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The ability to quit smoking by giving yourself lung, heart, and throat cancer, coupled with enphysema.

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The ability to sense every time your mom and dad are doing it even when you don't want to.

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The power to shit on the ceiling

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The epic power of laser pointer vision.

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The power to fuck your mum whenever you want

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yo mama

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The ability to pirate every song you want without getting caught. However, they can only be Justin Bieber songs

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the power to enter a coma.

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a healing factor that can heal paper cuts in 2hours

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The power to defy gravity, but only for the fraction of a second.

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The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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The power of being able to see 1 day into the past

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the power to stop masturbating every day

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The power to cause weeds to grow twice as fast as usual in your bed of prized petunias.

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The power to become THE APOCALYPSE But you are NOT FIT TO SURVIVE....

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The power to to type Pointless Super Powers

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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the power to see through people's clothing when they're naked

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the power to gain the intelligents of forest gump, but not the table tennis playing ability

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The power to finish right before you start (If you know what I mean)

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!