swear words -jesse

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The power to be number one, unless someone was better than you.

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The power to get laid with whomever you choose, but they look and feel like one of your parents.

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The power to have Pauly D haircut while being a dumbass.

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To have the power to breathe

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The power to throw fire out of your hands but at the same time burn your hands.

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The power to get you`re dick stuck to a huge, heavy metal bar no one can lift nor move, either you stay there till you die, or you grab a knife and...

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The power to sleep anytime and anywhere in an instant, but, u can never blink.

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The power to be french.

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The power to become encased in concrete at will.

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The power to sneeze whenever you think about apples.

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ability to levitate using my fart...

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the power to find a needle in a haystack

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the power to fly, but only when you poop

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The ability to invent a new language that no one else will ever learn.

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The power to ramble on and on endlessly with no end in sight with the most inane of thoughts that no one can begin to guess when they will end or what the value or goal of anything so long-winded might be until you find yourself questioning your very desire to go living if you are only going to continue rambling.

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The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

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The power to read your own mind

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the ability to add edges to any circle on anything that you can write on

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The power of having a short attention sp-- Ooh shiny!

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The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

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No matter what you eat, always shit peanut butter.

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whenever you want to sleep an anime starts happening in real life

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The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!