The power to vomit every time you burp.

The power to have super hearing but only works when you are dead.

The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle

The power to hold your breath when you die

The Power to fart extremely loudly every time your in a crowd.

The ability to open a door that was already open.

Justin Bieber

The power to be able to taste shit from miles away.

The power to fly, but only in microgravity.

The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

The power to fly really fast but only in closets.

boo

The power to phase through walls whenever there is a door nearby leading to the next room

The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

The power to speak to toasters

Ability to emit a low-level light, but only when standing near a candle.

The power to know the word for potato in every human language... including binary (011100000110111101110100011000010111010001101111)

The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

the power to stand straight but only when you bend over

The power to change the color of your saliva.

The power to get cancer all the time. And strokes.

The power to have a %90 chance of dying every single second.

The power to sit on a pile of change and add it up.

The Power To Fly Without control

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!