the power to turn into toilet paper but not back

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power to make the most lethal fart know to man but only when you girlfriends is around

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The power to make up pointless superpowers

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the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

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The ability to digest three types of earth elementals

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The ability to teleport a maximum of two inches.

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the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

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The power to smell people's moods

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The power to lick any telephone pole to call somebody in the winter.

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The power to let someone control your dick

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The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

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The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

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The power to produce a hand vacuum from your belly button that only sucks up lint for your belly button

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The power to find your lost keys only if the keys are in your pocket.

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the power to hovertate

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The power to read your own mind

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The power to turn toast back into bread

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The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

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the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

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to create balloons out of anywhere on your body, and twist them into whatever you look at.

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The ability to melt ice slower than it would usually melt

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The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

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The power the ability to read minds but only on February the 30th 1783.

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The power to fry and suffer harder than anyone when lit on fire.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!