The ability too shit out calculators every 10 seconds.

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The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

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The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

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the ability to un-dank any meme

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The power to break a Nokia

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The power to blow up, before a bomb next to you blows up.

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The ability to have superman's powers and weaknesses, but have an 100% chance to have a suit made of indestructible kryptonite.

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The ability to find the sharpest object in an given drawer, by having it puncture your hand. Every time.

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The power to die,but only if your alive!

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The power to turn your current clothes inivisible

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The power of women's rights.

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to get an A+ on every test- but you need to study for 5 hours or so ahead of time

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the power to gain the intelligents of forest gump, but not the table tennis playing ability

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The ability to metamorphose into any kind of cheese

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The power of super farts, which doesn't work unless you probably breathe, by super farts I also mean really really really stinky long farts..

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The power to heal but every time you heal your leg or arm falls off.

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the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

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The power to hurt other people by hurting yourself, and you both sustain the damage.

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The ability to understand everything about a language after 100 years of intense studying when you could be doing something more interesting.

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The power to die at will

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The power to think of a good super power right now.

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The power to stay dry in the rain, while indoors.

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The ability to create your own reflection on any reflective surface.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!