The ability to hear the opinions of inanimate objects.

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The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

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The ability to fart extremely loudly every time you blink - but only when having dinnerwith your girlfriends parents for the first time.

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The power get everyone's attention by jerking off in public

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The ability to die on command.

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The power to remove cancer from stroke victim's bodies.

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The power to fry and suffer harder than anyone when lit on fire.

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The power to fire lasers from my nipples.

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The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

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to make your bowel work backwards

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the ability to only crap while on a toilet

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The power to teleport......one nanometer every million years

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power to drop the soap in the jail shower room

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the power to change people socks on command

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the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

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The power to kill someone with a knife

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All of aquaman's powers.

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----the power to hold your breath until your die-----

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The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

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The power to make any glass of water into milk

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The power to have your toe nails and fingernails be bulletproof.

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The power to spit venom, but it misses 99.9% of the time.

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The ability to turn your fingers into angry bears without you being able to control them

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The power to annoy people with saying the same meme to then(Examples: WHAT ARE THOOSE,21 etc.)...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!