The power to moves in slow motion.

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The power to fart rainbows

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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the power to summon rick astley whenever you want to, but only when you're the only one in the room, so only you can hear him

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The Power To Be Sent Back To Your Exam's And Then Getting All The Answers Wrong Making Your Intermittent Future A Dream And Your Mansion A Tent.

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the ability to blow yourself

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The power to blink 1.0000000000001 times faster than the average human.

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the power to morph into yourself

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The power of attracting lightning to your body, but not being imune to it.

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The power to fly only one inch off the ground

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The power to have no superpower

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a healing factor that can heal paper cuts in 2hours

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The power to see through womens clothes, but your gay.

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The ability to die, when you say: "death powers activate!" . You can only do it once though.

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The power to clone yourself, except all your clones become Catholic priests. Moral: "Mommy! It was HE who touched me!"

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The ability to know any language but only after learning it.

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The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to have any nice guy, but they're all gay.

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The power to grow bigger, but never smaller.

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The power to eat 2 hotdogs in the same bun

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The abillity to laugh hystericaly at theese superpowers, But only when On the toilet pooping.

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The power to bet on the fastest horse in the track at a formula 1 competition. Moral: RUN FORREST RUUUUUUN!

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The power to give yourself a migraine at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!