The power to survive at absolute zero

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power to eat 500000 big macs in a day

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The power to fly at 0.00000000000000001mm off of the ground at a speed of 1 mile per hour whenever you desperately need the toilet.

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The power to enlarge your penis to any size, but only you can see it.

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The power to talk in Wingdings.

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The ability not to be able to make a bong out of a taco bell cup

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The power to type a power on this website and see it's already taken.

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The power to swear if you do not believe in a God. Moral: Meh... if I post anything against God here you guys will thumb me down and that matters... it matters so much that I will use the section over to shit talk God... yeah... thumb me down already fearing zealots... show me your true power (being Gods bitches) now that is pointless power!

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The power to be writing a pointless superpower on a website about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive.

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the ability to stare at a cactus for a week without being bored

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The power to do anything that will not affect anyone but you in any way.

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the power of milking a cow aslong it is a horse that you are milking. the power to ride a bull for 0.55 nanoseconds. the power to kill 1 bacteria every 20 min. the power to spread herpes without having symptoms. the power of sharing awkward details of your bowel movements to your family at dinner. the power to lift a small cup of water. the power of falling of your face whilst knowing it will happen 20sec before. the power of inhibiting passage on the curb. the power to cause massive traffic jams without owning a car. the power of listening but not understanding. the power of understanding all languages but the one that is being spoken to you at the time.

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The power to have an indestructible tongue.

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the power to never be late to work, but only when you're unemployed.

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The power to think of your death and then you die.

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the ability to only crap while on a toilet

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The power to type any password only if some one tells you the password first.

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The power to make only right turns. take THAT nascar!

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The power is to think MEMEZ are so nonsence, Even if you ever kissed an girl.

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The abiltity to grow an additional 4 fingered hand from your inner thigh

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The power to fart in technicolor.

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The power to turn cake into pie

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The power to quit smoking 5 times in a week.

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the power to stare at pit bulls in the eyes and imitate them

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!