The power to waste time and sit around doing nothing and not helping society when you could be doing something productive

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The power of x-ray vision but unfortunatly your blind

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The power to die whenever you feel the slightest bit joyful, happy excited, etc.

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The power to be a common person

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The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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The power to remove all flavour from food.

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The power to not do it.

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The power to think of a clever comeback as soon as the person has left the room.

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The power to see you're self in a mirror

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The power to remove your foreskin at any given time

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The ability to run faster than the speed of sound, but only when laying down.

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The power to .... Make pointless superpowers! :D

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The ability to irreversibly turn into a turkey days before thanksgiving.

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The ability to count to potato

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The power of total invulnerability and immortality, stops working when you get hurt, or die.

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The power to teleport small dogs

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The power to elect George W Bush.

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The power to both love and hate marmite.

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The power to act like Tommy Wiseau

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The power to teleport yourself one step away

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The power to impress a mentally disabled person by doing absolutely nothing

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The power to run really fast, but only when facing brick walls 2 ft away.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!