No matter what you eat, always shit peanut butter.

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To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

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The power to create a pointless superpower

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The power to hole 1 inch putts.

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The power of immortality, but only when you try to commit suicide.

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The ability to excrete Hydrochloric acid, but only in your stomach.

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The power to become sick only to spread it to your enemy but you can't stop being sick until you have treatment.

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Ability to eat a burger without going to the mall first and talking to your grandma there for 45 minutes about how it hasn't rained for a quite awhile and we could sure use some!!!

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The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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The power to get an A+ on every test- but you need to study for 5 hours or so ahead of time

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The power to be a common person

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The power to control disabled people with your mind.

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The power of dying whenever you want.

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The power to think of a good super power right now.

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The power to die.

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To shit bricks.

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The power to fly, but only 1 millimeter above the ground, while moving at a speed slower than a snail.

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The ability to turn into a slightly damp sponge

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The ability to run faster than the speed of sound, but only when laying down.

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The power of the most useless power and have that power.

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The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

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the power to do blink every 20 years

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!