The ability to die on command.

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The power to see oxygen.

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The power to poo without wiping.

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The power to smell water.

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The power to speak in languages that no one around you understands.

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the power to see through clothes in a gay bar.

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

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The power to buy the newest iPhone without the charger...

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The power to lose all your limbs

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The ability to know how to drive a car but only when piloting light aircraft

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THE POWER OF PEDOBEAR!!!!! but only when theres law enforcement around

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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The power to journey into the future of the past.

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the power to be in AA.

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The ability to to die whenever you want. RIP

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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the power to melt your bones

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Strength to instantly kill anyone just by lightly tapping them, as long as they're physically stronger than you.

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the power to slitely change how you look by smiling

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The power of having all of Batman`s Superpowers.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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boo

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The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!