The power to teleport to the south pole.

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The power to kill yourself just by thinking about something.

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The power to turn into a 90 year old woman with 20+ diseases

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The power to climb up fallen trees

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The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

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The power to not be funny

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you can shoot cars but the always hit you

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The ability to headbutt yourself in the face.

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the power to summon a massive midget

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The power to not finish your....

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The power of super farts, which doesn't work unless you probably breathe, by super farts I also mean really really really stinky long farts..

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The power to bake cakes precisely 2.7% faster than usual.

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the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

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Justin Bieber

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The power to sneeze out of your mouth and cough out of your nose.

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The power to attract any women you like by ripping of your junk.

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The power to not think of a productive power.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The ability to understand everything about a language after 100 years of intense studying when you could be doing something more interesting.

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the power to be in AA.

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The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

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The power to use internet explorer at a moderate working speed

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The power to induce vomiting after a crazy junk food spree.

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The power to have razor sharp facial hair.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!