The power to bake cakes precisely 2.7% faster than usual.

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The power to burn the sun.

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The power to have any girl as your girl friend but they turn ugly

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The power to sneeze out of your mouth and cough out of your nose.

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The ability to look directly at the sun without damaging your eyes.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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The power to stay dry in the rain, while indoors.

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the power to be in AA.

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The power to make school 24 hours , and making vacations for 30 minutes.

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The ability to seduce any woman.....over 200lbs......that was born with a penis.

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The power to die from darting too hard

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The power to use internet explorer at a moderate working speed

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The power to have razor sharp facial hair.

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The ability to build a wall... wait a minute!

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The ability to swim in water.

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the power to be powerless

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the power to fail at life

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The power to get an erection in the most akward of situations.

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the power to die on the spot

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The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

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The power to get cancer all the time. And strokes.

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The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

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The power to create a vaporization beam that removes one atom per second.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!