The power to turn toast back into bread

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The power to teleport but you must have walked to that place within the last attosecond

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The power to have explosive diarrhea when people are looking at you.

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The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

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The power to not respond to gravity (only when you're in space).

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The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The power to understand irony.

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The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

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The power to turn shades of brown or red, but only when exposed to the sun for an extended amount of time.

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The power to release the bogus

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the power to fly but only 5 feet off the ground and at walking speed.

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The power to see through womens clothes, but your gay.

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The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

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The power to whant badly to have kids but you give birth to massive amounts of spiders, ducklings and some undefined type of small feline instead of childen

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The Power to enjoy Justin Beiber's music....

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The power to transform into anyone, but only in caricature form.

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The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

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the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

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the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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Power that makes you perfect in being useless

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The ability to keep a song stuck in your head overnight

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The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!