Have all the superpowers there is in one milisecond every 100 years (If your still alive)

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The ability to produce snot twenty times faster than normal.

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The power to be able to study seriously, but still be clueless when test day arrives.

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The power to turn grow a vagina that can whistle on your neck during a full moon.

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The ability to excrete Hydrochloric acid, but only in your stomach.

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The power to produce highly concentrated sulphuric acid in your sweat glands.

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The power to turn cake into pie

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power to be fluent in every language but only when your head is fully submerged underwater.

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The power to uncontrollably fart when your with your girlfriend

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The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

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The power to play all Videogames you want, but you have to pay the original price for them.

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The power to give yourself a staticshock, every time you touch yourself.

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the ability to turn off your super ability.....

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The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

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The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

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To be immortal, but injuries do not heal and the pain is 100 times more intense

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The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

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The power to have amazing sexual prowess for 24 straight hours, but only on days that you have to work overtime. This is actually true.

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The Power to enjoy Justin Beiber's music....

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the power to summon a massive midget

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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To be able to immediately know the name of anything you see

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The power to instant nose-bleed, but not be able to stop it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!