The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

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the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

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The power to turn grow a vagina that can whistle on your neck during a full moon.

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The ability to excrete Hydrochloric acid, but only in your stomach.

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The power to be invisible but only in the dark.

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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The power to see oxygen.

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The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

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The power to uncontrollably fart when your with your girlfriend

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The power to smell water.

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The power to speak in languages that no one around you understands.

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the ability to turn off your super ability.....

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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I’M JUST HAVING AN ALLERGIC REACTION TO THE UNIVERSE. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

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The ability to know how to drive a car but only when piloting light aircraft

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The power to be invisible when no one is looking at you!

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The ability to to die whenever you want. RIP

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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the power to slitely change how you look by smiling

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The power of having all of Batman`s Superpowers.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!