The ability to face reality after reading all the pointless powers

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the ability to grow a boner to an incredible size but only when you are asked to come up to the front of the class

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The power to make people extremely happy as soon as you die.

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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the ability to see through air

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the power to be forever alone

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The power to make coma patients bark.

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The power to ejaculate laser beams.

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The power to resurrect Hitler at will, will only work if you are Jewish.

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The power to never finish what you sta...

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i love to make shit brix

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The power to communicate with applesauce.

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The power to have your entire body totally frictionless. Except for your nipples. They have a drag coefficient of around 5 parachutes.

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I got rhe power to always respawn in the middle of a noob tube. it's a blast...

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The power to quote memes randomly

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Qu1. Why is Steven Hawking so smart A. Because he's half robot. Qu.2. Why is Albert Einstein so smart A. He got forced to try things.

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the power of not being able to feel pain during constipation

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The power to speed up time moments before you are about to die.

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If you shy of meeting girls in real life and find it easier on a computer and cam, you will have the power to pull 100s of girl every week local to you so go to www.sexigirls.co.uk and see the power you never knew you ever had to pull girls so fast.

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The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

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The power to blame it on the Boogie

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The power to turn 85 in 85 years.

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The power to shit out toilet paper.

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the power of milking a cow aslong it is a horse that you are milking. the power to ride a bull for 0.55 nanoseconds. the power to kill 1 bacteria every 20 min. the power to spread herpes without having symptoms. the power of sharing awkward details of your bowel movements to your family at dinner. the power to lift a small cup of water. the power of falling of your face whilst knowing it will happen 20sec before. the power of inhibiting passage on the curb. the power to cause massive traffic jams without owning a car. the power of listening but not understanding. the power of understanding all languages but the one that is being spoken to you at the time.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!