Listen to Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black everywhere you go.

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The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

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you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

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The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

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The power to like any show

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The power to disintegrate yourself

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The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The ability to not slip on banana peels

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The power of turning into a crushed can right after you got into a car accident.

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The power to not do it.

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the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

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The power of fart only in front of cheerleaders

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The power to used any power i want when you're asleep

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The power to smash people's heads in with things.

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The Power to make PotNoodle...

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The power to vote for the Presidential candidate of your choice, only to be overruled by the Florida Supreme Court.

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The ability to know the current mood of your doppleganger.

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The power to slowly float upward with awesome evil aura whenever you laugh evilly (just like in the movies/anime/etc) Only to realize you are stuck up there until someone gets a crane or something to get you down...

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The power to make whatever it is you see and/or think about into cotton candy.

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the power to stand straight but only when you bend over

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!