- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The ability to know what time it is when looking at a working clock.

The power to run really fast, but only when facing brick walls 2 ft away.

The ability to get shot, for real.

The ability to type incredibly fast when your keyboard is broken.

The power to heal yourself but only damage you inflict on yourself.

The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

The power to lose this power.

The ability to look at someone and die.

The power to whant badly to have kids but you give birth to massive amounts of spiders, ducklings and some undefined type of small feline instead of childen

The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

The power to fuck your mum whenever you want

The power to hold your fart unless people are around you

The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

The power to die while dieing

The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

The power of making toast land butter-side up

The ability to know if you're the only human alive.

The power to think salmon.

The power to open a walnut with your mind

The ability to walk slower than everyone else

The power to like any show

The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

Pointless Super Powers