The power to be fluent in every language but only when your head is fully submerged underwater.

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The power to sleep while you're awake.

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The power to turn into a skittles bag

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The ability to police irony

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The power to make a small chair appear -- one time.

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The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

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the power to have powers (super strength,speed ,and flight) in a minute only.

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The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

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The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

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The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

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The power to think of witty comebacks 3 days too late

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lol

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The power to remember and talk about random Pokémon facts during a life and death situation.

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the power to walk on land.

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to feel like you're gonna sneeze forever

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The power to read minds but only when you're alone

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The power to die just by trying to use the word l...

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The power to disintegrate yourself

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The power to eat soup with a fork.

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The power to stop time whenever you get stabbed in the liver

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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The power to not care.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!