The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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the power to make a pillow come to life once

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The power to grab a cup of purple drank, Then drink it

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The power to give yourself any disease, but not the power to cure it.

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the power of not being able to feel pain during constipation

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the power of super intelligence to go to college and actually expect a job these days.

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The power to see through things that are invisible.

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the power to detect when there is oxygen near you

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The power to teleport but you must have walked to that place within the last attosecond

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The power to drink alcohol without getting drunk.

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The power to see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch

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The power to become allmighty and imortal, all you need to do is to touch either Kryptonite, or adamantium.

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The power to murder rocks.

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The power to climb trees really fast, but they shrink when you do.

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the power to imagine any women naked...but only as an octogenerian

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The superpower to get your comment in the tops because you mistyped "the pewer to type backwards" backwards. Its a funny story actually, you people liked it so much that it skyrocketed past the correctly spelled ones and turned out top.. 40 or something? I am being modest here... just go into the popular sections and take a look. I would have told you it was me who wrote that super pewer but you would not really believe me would you? By the way thanks, it made me laugh, and I hope that is the same reason you thumbed it up, you people are awesome! Moral: It was me. (I mistyped the word mistyped itself which is grammatically incorrect by itself, now beam me up Scotty!)

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The power to discern the breed of a cat by the taste of its poop.

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the ability to eject a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing.

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Super strength that works for a millisecond.

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The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

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The power to run at the average speed of a normal person running.

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The ability to change the color of your socks while wearing shoes

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The power to shit yourself on a really hot day with no change of underwear

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!